Brush to Canvas

~ Survival

You know what? The "people" got in my head again! It took me away 20 years ago, but it won't take me away again. I get to the canvas, and that invisible moment between blank space and contact with brush, the moment of hesitation, when countless visions and captions of other peoples snicker's and comments invade my thought and give me doubt. Doubt that can be so devastating as to pull me away from the canvas and miss a moment, a moment that isn't easy to create.
I though I would have been passed this, I though I had built the skills to overcome this malady. Please painting god, give me the strength to carry on, the serenity to not be disposed from the comfort of my creative thought, and for God sake the wisdom to make a good painting.

Amen

- j